Turns out I did 112 practice exams (not including english) leading up to exams

I really miss him

That equates to around 150 hours on exams alone

He's not even gone for that long

Excluding 4 hours of tuition and roughly half the exam time that it took to mark said papers

I've really grown attached to him though, I guess that's why I don't like losing him, even if all that means is a few extra kilometres between us for two weeks

Wow, that's a lot more than I thought. I hope it shows

I feel somewhat pathetic about it but I don't even really care because we're lovely :)

au revoir. xo

and two and a half years later I responded

au revoir. xo

So yesterday I did seven chem exams -not sure about the quality of the last ones and today I have done barely anything because I really don't want to study for physics! I have also managed to lose several chem exams (I think) which is stressing me out because I can't correct my mistakes which is what I need most in this subject but I did email my teacher like a million times about it so I think I am going to go and take a shower now and then do one or two chem exams and actually mark the exams I did yesterday.

Tomorrow I am going to the beach so maybe when I get home I will do a physics exam eurghh and then wednesday all day I will do physics and then hopefully by the end of wednesday I will not be stressing out about this -it really doesn't help that my teacher not only responds to emails a week later or not at all, but only when he is at school.

merp merp merp I am so exhausted I just need to escape already (speaking of which, I do not actually have any plans of escaping after exams so not really much to look forward to there either...)

au revoir. xo

I'm in such a calloused state that I am able to remain unaffected by what would usually be considered frustrating or detrimental to myself. Honestly, I would be surprised if anything other than this/the usual occurred the night before my exam- the obsession of my parents.

au revoir. xo

groomed brows and steamed face later...

au revoir. xo

Once I finish exams I am going to try and not depress myself by keeping busy!

• I am going to clean my room and take out all year 12 related things such as past papers, textbooks and loose sheets to free up cupboard space.
• I am going to listen to cheery music and be happy
• I am going to see friends and not feel guilty
• I am going to live in the city during sunny days and be free
• I am going to re-arrange my furniture and make my room more 'homey'
• I am going to get a job and have a steady income so I can be more independent
• and lastly, I am going to try my hardest not to think, not to stress and not to feel bad

This sounds pretty good to me!

:)

au revoir. xo

This past week has been crazy!
Wednesday was dress up day and then after that was the IMAGINE DRAGONS CONCERT! Undoubtedly, one of the best concerts I have been to, mainly due to the people I went with.

Reconnected with a few people, especially one (although we only disconnected in my head) and it was such an amazing night, dancing away with one of my best friends to beautiful music and just not stressing or caring about anything important, having pure fun. Will definitely miss/yearn for another night like that!

And then today was uniform signing and everyone was so happy and I felt so good and not sad at all about finally finishing year 12 (and boy what a long study year it has been!) and yet it was such a short year, socially. Immense amounts of drama, a fuckload of emotion and so much love for so many people.

After looking through all the photos on facebook and about to read my dress, I am indeed sad. Sad because there is nothing I can do to go back. I feel as if these past 6 years have whizzed past! I mean, it was just yesterday that I was starting year seven, doing survivor, befriending people in Ms Orloff's year 9 english class, dating konrad, befriending Julsie and Costa and finally, dating Robert.

It has been such an amazing journey and I think it has finally hit me that it is all over! Just like that.

I will definitely continue to catch up with some people, especially as we might be going to different Uni's, but I am not so excited to start the next chapter of my life. I want to dwell in all these friendships I have created over the silliest things!

I want to be young and naive, I think I will miss that the most!

I certainly do not have any motivation to study for exams (and trying not to get re-pooped about schoolies), I just want to be with people!!!!


Ahh I feel so emotionally messy right now, :)))))))


fuck I love people, but it's always too late when I realize.

au revoir. xo