new mindset.

So today we had a 'thinklean' program at school. It was valued at $399 and yet we get to use if for free for a year. The man assured us that it was a well-known success. Well then sir, why have I never heard of it? yes, that's what I thought..
Long story short, as with most of these things, it's a sham. I mean seriously, the online program we use could just as easily be replicated for FREE on paper or just simply on word or something of the likes.. There was even this section called "My Diary", pfft, like I'm going to write all my personal things down there..that's why I have a blog ! However through the droning words which just seemed to be screaming 'money, money, MONEY' at us, there was one semi-good line -"Never. Give. Up". Hence my new mindset to be happy and enjoy life for as long as I can and then if the time comes and I fall back into a slum..well I'll sulk for a bit and then bounce back up and get on with things ! :) unless something truly horrible happens...

On a brighter note, today was a good day. School was pretty much a bludge with the sessions taking up half the day and then some pointless English debate with free lollies ! XD
Later, and I'm not going to go through all of this as that would be a little weird for people to read and kind of boring too but as I was waiting for my bus, soaked, there were about 10 cars beeping at another. I was actually quite petty. Like come on man ! Just wait for it to turn, clearly it wont turn any faster if you beep. -.-

Oh yeah, I also went to my boiffs house (prime example of pre-teen language right there, it makes me cringe when I read things like that) but that's another story...

And then last but not least I came home and there was a cute little parcel waiting for me on the table (I love spontaneous gifts, no matter how small.. they are an instant mood-raiser!).

Such a pointless post but I just felt like sharing, one-time only offer. ha-ha ha-ha ha.

au revoir. xo


P.S. LOVING LIFE ! :)

lolstickle sticks !

As stated many times before I supposedly do not write for others...
So here's your mention pops William DJ.

Maybe one day I'll listen to my own rules ! :)

au revoir. xo

Optimism = freedom

Today two important people to me said that they're sick of all the depressing posts and thoughts and actions etc. I can't be bothered arguing with them so I'm taking the easy way out.

I'm going to try and be happy happy happy from this day forth. Yes, once in a while I'll be all anti-people but so what?

:) <-- marks the beginning.

au revoir. xo

P.S. I feel as if I have forgotten what this blog is really about so I shall return to my old style soon. :)

Smile once in a while

Today my boyfriend complimented me, just something simple and yet it made me feel so special. <3

au revoir. xo

Confusion collapses.

So recently I've been under the weather, quite the depressing fellow if you will.
I'm not going to go through what's happening because that's just silly and I do not feel like it.
However,
The past few days have been spent crying and crying and crying. Drama queen? I guess.
I tried telling myself that this was just a dream but it wasn't. Last night to fall asleep I imagined myself walking along the edge of a fence, much like a cat, only to slip and fall. Then, I thought about jumping off our fence but figured it was too short and would only injure...

Then today, whilst waiting for my bus I decided to stand in the middle of the road until it came. I did have to move a few times for there were cars and I figured that once again, they would only injure.

So, this is the part where flashing neon signs are signaling to you that I'm completely mental and need help so let me explain... I would never think of taking my own life, or hurting myself. That's a lie. Okay, so I would never do it. But somehow the thought of being able to, if I were to dream it so, gives me a choice. Inturn, some sort of twisted freedom.

so, as much as I try to convince myself in every post that there is no audience, that too is a lie.

au revoir. xo

Emo pod.

Feelin' like a Marionette, shame.

au revoir. xo

What's an emotion?

I don't know how I'm supposed to feel.
Angry that you're trying to leave everyone?
Frustrated that I can't help you?
Distraught at the though of my life with out you?
Or just hurt that you're doing this to yourself?

How about broken?


au revoir. xo